“Girls talk too much” - Peter Pan
We all know it - we women love talking. This can be very charming actually - sometimes you’ll chirp along like a little child. Many times, however, it can get us into trouble.
Aside from the obvious pitfalls of talking too much - gossip, wasting of time, empty-headedness - in a marriage, often speaking messes things up. For example, as women we tend to just sort of comment on everything or mother the situation “oh, we need to do such and such” or “watch out for that”. We call it caring. Guys call this nagging.
On top of it, we tread dangerous waters when it comes to speaking about our relationships. Most guys really can’t articulate how they feel, or if they do, it comes out dumb or just plain hurtful. So save yourself some pain - just don’t delve into too many issues on how a guy “feels” - you might not like what you hear. Sure, it’s the “truth” but many of us can’t handle it. So why go there. It’s usually an unnecessary misunderstanding anyway.
Say you have a guy and a girl sitting there. The girl says “What are you thinking about” and the possibilities are beautiful - how much he loves her, how beautiful she is, how he’d give anything to be with her. What he says is, “work” or something worse. So what’s the point - I mean if he tells you how he feels, great. But until then, don’t hold your breath.
A self-respecting woman will be quiet a lot of the time. Get a life of your own, don’t nag, don’t speak if not necessary. You know what will happen? The guy will have a lot more respect for you, and even interest. Speaking too much causes you to lose your upper hand (in charm and stuff). So try it sometime - let your eyes, your body speak.
And keep your mouth shut. : )
Taken from here
My thoughts? I'm still thinking.
3 comments:
interesting
and makes me think about the theories which state that men and women communicate differently.
like women tend to tag questions on the end of phrases, in order to gain a response - "it's nice weather today,isn't it? i probabaly shouldn't wear this dress tonight,should i?
and men APPARENTLY only tend to get involved in conversations they've initiated, as then they have more control and know what they're talking about.
I think you need a balance with everything. I'm sure my husband would be bored if I didn't talk so much. I asked him what he thinks, he said be yourself.
assalaamu alaikum,
i just came across this in my links page
sometimes i write things that are complex and people don't get the subtlties i aim for
of course, you should be yourself and talk - as you said husbands enjoy hearing their wives talk (usually lol)
the points i made weren't meant to negate those (as they seemed obvious)
i can't tell you how many sisters were offended or at least concerned that perhaps i was saying women shouldn't talk at all, or keep problems to themselves, etc.
you know, i wrote another piece called "leave your husband" and again, people completely misunderstood me - a bunch of brothers came on, some chastizing me, some praying for my marriage lol, thinking i was writing a piece of frustration or suggesting people actually leave/divorce their husbands
finally, alhamdulillaah a sister came on who got it and i like jumped for joy lol
anyway, if you're ever up to it, maybe check that out too and see what you think
good luck with your blog :) baarakallaahu feek
wassalaamu alaikum wa rahmatullaahi wa barakaatuh
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