Sabr or Shukr – The Worry Stops Here

Aasiyah, the wife of Fir'own, had eman in Allah subhaanahu wa ta ‘aala that thrived under the shadow of someone who said, "I am your Lord, Most High!" When news reached Fir'own of his wife's eman, he beat her and commanded his guards to beat her. They took her out in the scalding noon heat, tied her hands and feet, and beat her perpetually. Who did she turn to? She turned to Allah! She prayed, "My lord, build for me a home with You in Paradise and save me from Fir'own and his deeds and save me from the transgressive people."

It was narrated that when she said this, the sky opened for her and she saw her home in Paradise and she smiled. The guards watched in astonishment as she was being tortured but yet smiling. Frustrated, Fir'own commanded a boulder to be brought and dropped on Aasiyah, to crush her to death. But Allah took her soul before the boulder was brought and she became an example for all the believing men and women until the end of time:

And Allah has set forth an example for those who believe – the wife of Fir'own – when she said, "My Lord, build for me a home with You in Paradise, and save me from Fir'own and his deeds, and save me from the transgressive, disbelieving people” (At-Tahreem 66/11).

In the hadith of Jibraeel, when he came to the Prophet sal Allahu alayhi wa sallam and asked him about Islam, eman, and ihsaan, the Prophet sal Allahu alayhi wa sallam said about eman:

"Eman is to believe in Allah, His angels, His books, His messengers, the Final Day, and the divine decree – the good and the bad thereof."

Today I shall focus on the last article of eman – to believe in the divine decree, the good and the bad thereof.

As you and I travel though life, we find ourselves in one of two situations. Either something good is happening in our lives, in which case as Muslims our role is to thank Allah for the blessing, or something bad or something we dislike is happening to us, and our role then is to be patient. This is the formula for a happy life, a life cruising towards the pleasure of Allah. Sabr (patience) or shukr (gratitude), the worry stops here.

The Messenger of Allah sal Allahu alayhi wa sallam said:

"Strange is the affair of the mu'min (the believer). Verily, all his affairs are good for him. If something pleasing befalls him he thanks (Allah) and it becomes better for him. And if something harmful befalls him he is patient (saabir) and it becomes better for him. And this is only for the mu'min."

Ibn Al-Jowzee said, "If this dunya was not a station of tests it would not be filled with sicknesses and filth. If life were not about hardship, then the prophets and the pious would have lived the most comfortable of lives. Nay, Adam suffered test after test until he left the dunya. Nuh cried for 300 years. Ibrahim was thrown into a pit of fire and later told to slaughter his son. Ya'qub cried until he became blind. Musa challenged Fir'own and was tested by his people. Eesa had no provision except the morsels his disciples provided him with. And Muhammad sal Allahu alayhi wa sallam met poverty with patience as his uncle, one of the most beloved relatives to him, was slain and mutilated and his people disbelieved in him ... and the list of prophets and the pious goes on and on."

What happens to us happens by the will of Allah subhaanahu wa ta ‘aala. It is an article of our eman that we believe in qada' and qadr and that we are pleased with Allah’s choice. Good or seemingly bad, it is all the test of this dunya. How can we imagine that we shall not be tested when those who were better than us suffered what they suffered? They, however, came away with the pleasure of Allah subhaanahu wa ta ‘aala.

Al Hasan ibn Arafah narrated that he visited Imam Ahmad ibn Hanbal after he was whipped and tortured. He said to him, "O Abu Abdillah, you have reached the station of the Prophets!"

He said, "Keep quiet. Verily, I saw nothing more than people selling their deen and I saw scholars that were with me sell their faith. So I said to myself, 'Who am I, what am I? What am I going to say to Allah tomorrow when I stand in front of Him and He asks me, 'Did you sell your deen like the others did?'"

He continued, "So I looked at the whip and the sword and chose them. And I said, 'If I die, I shall return to Allah and say that I was told to say that one of Your Characteristics was something created but I did not. ' After that, it will be up to Him - either to punish me or be Merciful to me."

Al-Hasan ibn Arafah then asked, "Did you feel pain when they whipped you?"

He said, "Yes, I felt the pain up to 20 lashes then I lost all feeling (They whipped him over eighty times). After it was over I felt no pain and that day I prayed Dhuhr standing."

Al-Hasan ibn Arafah started weeping when he heard what had happened. Imam Ahmad questioned him, "Why are you crying? I did not lose my eman. After that why should I care if I lose my life?"

These people were better than us, but this was how they were tested.

There some facts about the tests of life, the good and the bad that befalls us:

1. Much of what befalls us is the direct result of our own sins. Allah subhaanahu wa ta ‘aala says:

And whatever misfortune befalls you it is because of what your hands have earned. And He pardons much Ash-Shura 42/30).

Muhammad ibn Seereen used to say when his debts piled up and he felt sad, "I know that the cause of this sadness is a sin I committed over 40 years ago."

2. People understand that when something bad happens it is a test from Allah ‘azza wa jall. But dear brothers and sisters, the good things that happen to us are also a test. Allah subhaanahu wa ta ‘aala says:

And we tested them with good (blessings) and evil (calamities) in order that they might turn back (Al-A’raf 7/168).

Abd alMalik ibn Ishaq said, "There is no one that is not tested with health and prosperity to measure how thankful he is."

And the Companion AbdurRahman ibn 'Awf radi Allahu anhu said, "We

were tested with hardship and were patient. And then we were tested with prosperity and we were not patient. Because of this Allah states:

O ye who believe! Let not your wealth or your children divert you from the remembrance of Allah. And whosoever does that, then they are the losers (Al-Munafiqun 63/9).

3. Patience must happen from the beginning, not three days later or one day later, but rather at the first news of the calamity. The Prophet sal Allahu alayhi wa sallam said, "Verily patience (is only sabr when practiced) at the first hit (of news)."

4. There are things that contradict sabr. Tearing ones shirt, for example, slapping ones face, slapping hands, shaving ones head, and cursing and wailing. Umm Salamah radi Allahu anha narrates that she heard the Messenger of Allah sal Allahu alayhi wa sallam say:

"Any Muslim who says when a calamity befalls him that which Allah commanded him: ‘To Allah we belong and to him we return. O Allah reward me in this calamity and give me better then it’ - Allah will grant him better than (that which he lost) (Muslim)."

5. These tests and hardships wash away our sins. Aisha radi Allahu anha said, "Verily, fever sheds sins like a tree sheds leaves."

6. The hardships that befall us distinguish the believers from the insincere. Shumayt ibn Ajlaan said, "The pious and the ungrateful are hidden by health. Yet when calamities befall, the two men are separated (by how they react)."

Allah ‘azza wa jall says in the Quran:

Alif laam meem. Do people think that they will be left alone because they say, "We believe," and will not be tested? Indeed We tested those who (lived) before them (Al-Ankaboot 29/1-3).

PART II: Towards Sabr

Ali radi Allahu anhu said, "Verily sabr is to eman what the head is to the body. When the head is cut off, the body falls. (He then raised his voice) Verily there is no eman for he who has no sabr (patience)."

There are three types of sabr that the Muslim must have:

1. Sabr in the obedience of Allah subhaanahu wa ta ‘aala. For example, one must be patient and perform their Fajr salah at it's appointed time.

2. Sabr in not disobeying Allah subhaanahu wa ta ‘aala. For example, someone might be upset at another person and think, "I just have to insult him." No, rather we are commanded by He who gave us our tongues not to follow the whispers of Shaytaan. We must have sabr in not disobeying Allah.

3. Sabr in what Allah subhaanahu wa ta ‘aala decrees on us. For example, if our child was to pass away we should be patient and seek the reward of Allah in our patience and say only that which is pleasing to Allah.

There are two keys which, if we understand them, we shall open the door to sabr

in our lives:

The first key: know that our souls, families and wealth do not belong to us, they belong to Allah subhaanahu wa ta ‘aala. He gave them to us as a loan to see what we would do with them. When he takes them back, He is taking back what belongs to Him. We had nothing before the blessing and we'll have nothing after it. We did not create the blessing from nothing, so how can we claim that it belongs to us?

The second key: We are on a journey and the destination is the Hereafter - Paradise or Hell. We shall be leaving the dunya behind us and we will return back to Allah by ourselves. This is what needs our focus. If Allah subhaanahu wa ta ‘aala is pleased with us then no worry. If He is not pleased with us then all worry.

Allah subhaanahu wa ta ‘aala revealed:

Guard strictly the (five obligatory) prayers, especially the middle salah and stand before Allah in obedience (Al-Baqarah 2/238).

The verses before this aayah deal with divorce. The verses after it deal with divorce. So why was this verse placed in the middle?

The ‘ulama have suggested, wa Allahu ta‘aala ‘alim, that in the hard times that a person goes through (especially in a divorce) he should not forget the remembrance of Allah, the salah. It is that salah, coupled with sabr, that will pull him through the difficulty.

O you who believe! Seek help in patience and salah. Truly, Allah is with those that are patient (Al-Baqarah 2/153).

In conclusion, Allah subhaanahu wa ta ‘aala gives the following good news:

And give good news to the patient / who, when afflicted with calamity say, "Truly, to Allah we belong and truly, to Him we shall return." / They are those on whom the salawat (i.e. the blessing and forgiveness) of their Lord is upon them, and who shall receive His Mercy, and it is they who are the guided ones (Al-Baqarah 2/155-157).

Allah promises anyone who wants to work on his or her patience three things: forgiveness, mercy, and guidance. Who could ask for more?


by Muhammad Alshareef

khutbah.com

Re-charged Mum of 3 - All praise is due to Allah!

Alhamdulillah my 3rd daughter was born almost 3 weeks ago by the Grace and Mercy of Allah. Alhamdulillah another difficult pregnancy is over and now I'm trying to make the most of my energy and good health that Allah has blessed me with (I hardly spend any quality time with my girls since I was so sick,) as well as trying to make the most of the lovely weather at the moment. I've been doing various gardening activities with them and hope to post up some activity/ lesson plans soon.

There are so many benefits to gardening and getting the children to attempt to grow some of their own food. Most importantly though I feel it helps them to become more aware of Allah as as the Creator of all things and controller of all affairs since a seed may not even germinate.

They also learn to be responsible as they have to remember to water the soil each day, they acquire patience - as they wait for the seedlings to appear and learn to make du'aa - as they really want the seedlings to appear soon!

I hope the du'aas are answered soon though as I'm also having to acquire my own patience... :-)

The Best Me I can Be.

I came across these great books in Cairo. I've never seen these books in the UK and the publishers, Sunflower Books are located in Nasr City, Cairo.

The series is called The Best Me I Can be written by David Parker.
The titles are as follows:
I'm a Good Friend!
I Show Respect!
I Will Keep Trying!
I Care About Others
I Accept You As You Are.
I can Share.I can Coorperate.
I Am Generous.
I Am Responsible.
I Am Positive

Here's an excerpt from I Accept You As You Are, (my favourite).
I Want to be special, important- just me.
With so many others, how can that be?
Some children have different color skin.
Some are tall, and some are thin.
Some see with their fingers [the picture is of a child reading Braille] or talk with their hands.
Other children ride because they cannot stand.
I may not know their names or their family, but all the children who I see are important just like me.

The Parental Note from I show Respect, (Maymoonahs favourite - although she calls it 'I show respex') reads: This book is about respect. Respect is a very difficult concept to explain to young children. Long before children understand what respect is, they need to learn some of the behaviours associated with it. Repetition is a wonderful way to teach this. It is the goal here through repetition to teach, review and reinforce some of the behaviours of respect.

Each book also comes with a 'Try This' idea to help you and your child to interact with the book.

The books cost me 1 British Pound each which really is a bargain since quality childrens books are hard to come by these days.

I've searched online and it seems there arn't many places that these books are available, Amazon has one or two available and so do Scholastic.com. The main website is hellodavid.com to purchase the books, that's if you wanted those particular titles mentioned (there are more titles than that though.)

If anybody from Manchester would like me to bring some books back for them (or anybody from outside Greater Manchester if you are likely to see me or my husband at some point,) you can leave your Name and Number in this comments section (I will not display them) or you can email me. Please state the titles and how many you would like.

The meaning of Hayaa

Hayaa itself is derived from the word hayaat which means life.

In English, it may be translated as modesty, shyness, self-respect, bashfulness, shame, honour, etc.

The original meaning of Hayaa according to a believer's nature, refers to a bad and painful feeling accompanied by embarrassment, caused by one's fear of being exposed or censured for some unworthy or indecent conduct.

"Surely Allaah (is One who) has hayaa and is the Protector. He loves hayaa and people who cover each others faults." Saheeh al-Bukhaaree

"Every way of life has a innate character. The character of Islaam is hayaa." Abu Daawood

"Hayaa does not bring anything except good." al-Bukhaaree

"Hayaa comes from eeman; eeman leads to Paradise. Obscenity comes from antipathy; and antipathy leads to the fire." al-Bukhaaree

"Hayaa and Trustworthiness will be the first to go from this world; therefore keep asking Allaah for them." al-Bayhaaqee

"Say to the believing men that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty: that will make for greater purity for them: and Allaah is well acquainted with all that they do. And say to the believing women that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty; that they should not display their beauty and ornaments except what (must ordinarily) appear thereof; that they should draw their veils over their bosoms and not display their beauty..." [Soorah an-Noor (24):30-31]


(AlMaghrib Forum)

Al Furqan Mosque & Coffee

My Long Lost Coffee...
Well this probably doesn't tie in very well after Umm Zaida's post on 'Balanced Diet,' but I'm sure she'll forgive me after trying this coffee!

My husband and I are very into our coffee and trying different ones. Not long ago I was at the hairdressers and they made me a cup of coffee. It was the nicest coffee that I have ever tasted, trust me - I've been drinking coffee since I was 8!

My Nanny, an elderly English Widow who would often look after us, used to make it for me as a way to make me drink milk.

So since tasting it at the hairdressers I've been wondering which coffee it is and Alhamdulillah I finally found it!


Al Furqan Mosque
And Speaking of coffee or rather coffee breaks... Myself and Umm Zaida, (a former Mancunian,) used to teach at Al Furqan Mosque In Rusholme.

The Masjid is in urgent need of charity donations in order to secure their premises.

Please check out their website on http://www.alfurqancentre.org.uk and donate whatever you can for the sake of Allah.

The brothers and sisters there do many things for children and the youth, as Myself and Umm Zaidah both witnessed first hand whilst working there.

With regards to the children we taught - many of whom were the children of the brothers who run the Mosque, I have to say I have never met such well mannered children. MashaAllah they were all so respectful and helpful, they would actually fight over who would help to carry our books, bags and even my umbrella! I had to have a child carry each of my things for me so that they all got a chance to help! May Allah have mercy on them all.

They have until October to raise these funds so please pass this message on to as many people as possible and support this.


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Parenting Course Notes - Week 7

By Umm Zaidah Nusaybah

Balanced diet

In this session we discussed the importance of eating a balanced diet, the different food groups and how we can incorporate healthy eating in our own families.
We were asked to discuss what it means to have a balanced diet. We came up with the following points:
• Protein
• Dairy products
• Rest/sleep
• Moderation-in what we eat
• Regular meals-not skipping any meals
• Variety
• Fluids
• 5 a day
• Exercise
• Full fat for under ones

We discussed the five food groups and the types of foods in each group. We also discussed the amounts we should consume from each group.
Protein-fish, meat
Fibre-brown bread, brown rice oats
Carbohydrates-pasta, potatoes
Fats and dairy-cheese, milk
Fruits and vegetables- apples, strawberries, cabbage.

Carbohydrates can be classified into two categories, refined carbohydrates which consist of white rice, white flour and unrefined carbohydrates which consist of wholemeal bread, brown rice, brown pasta etc. Unrefined carbohydrate is better for us to consume especially for those of us trying to lose a few pounds.

Fruits and vegetables have a lot of vitamins and minerals. We should try to eat at least five portions every day. I know this can be quite hard with all the unhealthy alternatives on offer (i.e. cakes, biscuits) but we should adopt this habit especially when we have our children to think about. So instead of giving them sweets, biscuits and other junk food as snacks we should replace these with fruits and other healthier snacks insha’Allah.

It is sad to so many children who are over-weight. We as Muslims should remember that our children are a trust from Allah for whom we will be questioned about. Therefore, we must make sure that they eat a healthy balanced diet to keep them fit and free from illness insha’Allah.

Most vitamins cannot be made by our bodies so we need to take supplements.
Vitamin A looks after our eyes and skin cells. Examples of some food that contain vitamin A are sweet potatoes, oranges, dark green leafy vegetables and carrots. Vitamin A deficiency may lead to impaired vision or blindness.

Vitamin D is obtained from direct sunlight. This vitamin helps us to absolve calcium into our bodies. Foods that contain vitamin D are oily fish and dairy products. Vitamin D deficiency is known to cause several bone diseases.

Vitamin E fights free-radicals (which damage our cells). This vitamin is found in vegetables, poultry, fish and fortified cereals. A deficiency of vitamin E may result in muscle weakness, blindness, poor transmission of nerve impulse.

Vitamin K helps us to make protein. Foods containing vitamin K are soya oil and margarine. Lack of Vitamin K may lead to massive uncontrolled bleeding, malformation of developing bones.

Vitamin B helps the flow of blood smoothly. Foods that contain this vitamin are potatoes, bananas, lentils, liver oil, liver, turkey and tuna. Vitamin B deficiency can result in anemia, acne, disease of the nervous system and heart.

Vitamin C is important for the development of bones and skin. It also helps to observe iron. Foods containing vitamin C are spinach, broccoli, and citrus fruits (did you know that peppers contain four times more vitamin C than oranges!!) Lack of vitamin C may lead to developing scurvy.

Minerals such as Calcium, Magnesium, Phosphorus and Sodium are also needed. Foods containing these minerals are milk and dairy products.

Allah says “And eat of the things which Allah has provided for you, lawful and good and fear Allah in whom you believe” (Mai’dah V:88)

Allah has blessed us with so many variety of foods alhamdulillah but we should stick to the ones that are lawful and GOOD insha’Allah.
And Allah knows best.

By Umm Zaidah Nusaybah

Parenting Course – Week 5

By Umm Zaidah Nusaybah

Respect

Respect is often associated with elders. We are taught to respect our parents, aunts, uncles, grandparents etc. The subject of respecting youngsters is quite alien. How often do we see children being spoken to in a derogatory manner? Being criticized for not doing something correctly or being shouted at for causing an accident? Have we ever stopped to think about how that child feels when we behave in such a manner? We need to ask ourselves, how would you feel if we were being treated in this way. We would probably have low self-esteem and be scared of doing certain things due to the fear of being criticized. Subhan’Allah, there is a famous saying “Respect, give it to get it”. So think about this for a moment, if we do not respect our children then what guarantee do we have that they will respect us.

At the beginning of this session we were asked to narrate an incident where we felt disrespected. The following are some of the responses. One sister said she feels disrespected when people look at her with pity because she wears hijab and jilbab because they she is oppressed. Another sister said she felt disrespected when someone called her stupid because she didn’t know where a certain country was situated. One sister said she felt disrespected when a guest said they didn’t like her cooking, which she spent hours preparing! Another sister spoke about people swearing and the fact that she finds it offensive and disrespectful. It is even more shocking when practising Muslims use foul language.

After listening to everyone’s accounts we came up with a list of actions which we find disrespectful. These include;
• Being mocked
• Not listening
• Being shouted at
• Being criticised
• Pointing fingers
• Breaking boundaries
• Accusing
• Having no eye contact
• Hearing swear words
• Opinions not being valued
• Using inappropriate speech
• Being judged
• Abusing trust
• Backbiting
• Lying

In the next part of the session we were put into groups of three and presented with different scenarios involving parents and their children. What we were asked to do was determine whether the child was respected or disrespected in each scenario.

Scenario one
At a party a child breaks a glass by accident. The mother goes over to the child, shouts at him in front of everyone and leaves the child there.
We decided it was disrespectful as well as neglect. The mother should have removed the child from the area where the accident occurred and maybe she should have talked to him away from the people. She should not shout at him because it was an accident.

Scenario 2
A mother changes her babies’ nappy and exclaims in front of people “This is the third time I have had to change you!” The mother is annoyed with the child.
We decided this was disrespect because the child may have been embarrassed. Also, the child may have an upset stomach. Instead of the mother being annoyed she should remember that she will be rewarded for changing her baby’s nappy insha’Allah.

Scenario 3
A father takes his little girl shopping and buys her a pair of shoes HE liked.
There was disagreement between the different groups. Those who said this was disrespect explained that the father did not give the child any choice. Those who said it was not disrespect said maybe the father knew if he gave the girl a choice she would choose something impractical. Maybe what the father should have done is to pick a few pairs and ask her which one she would prefer.

Scenario 4
A child is running and is about to cross the road. The mother shouts “stop” and the child stops.
We decide this was not disrespect although we had previously suggested being shouted at is a form of disrespect. In this incident it was necessary for the mother to shout to get the child’s attention and if she hadn’t shouted the child may have had an accident. Therefore, it is justified to shout in certain circumstances.

Scenario 5
At the dinner table two children are eating. One of them finishes his food so the father takes the food from the other child’s plate and puts it on the plate of the child who has finished.
We all strongly agreed that this was disrespect. Firstly the father did not ask the permission of the child. It was also suggested that some of us used to save our favourite foods to eat last and if that was the case here then the child will be very upset.

Scenario 6
A mother takes her child to the nursery for the first time. The child starts crying and the mother says to the teacher “she’s always like this”.
We decided this was disrespect because the mother should have been more sympathetic as it was the child’s first day at the nursery and almost everybody cries on their first day!!

Disrespect – conclusion
These scenarios actually do exist, so we should think carefully about what we say to our children. We should choose the words carefully and try our best not to disrespect them. We must look at the example of our beloved prophet (SAW) and how he dealt with children around him. He (SAW) always showed respect to children and was very affectionate towards them. For example, when a young boy’s father died, the prophet (SAW) said to him “I am sorry for your loss”. These words suggest that the prophet (SAW) treated the boy like an adult, therefore, giving him respect.
And Allah knows best.

By Umm Zaidah Nusaybah

JIMAS

Another JIMAS conference gone by and I'm left feeling tired and exhausted but not quite wanting to be back.

Some Benefits of attending the JIMAS Conference.

Sisterhood/brotherhood. Different ages, race, backgrounds, professions. Meeting brothers and sisters that you only see once a year at JIMAS!
A few sisters and I played 'guess what race percentages' (ourselves) and our children are- it was humorous to say the least, (other sisters looked on like we were a tad crazy.)

Fresh Green Air, close to nature, green trees and plenty of weeping willows (my favorite!)

Being among the people of knowledge who all differ in their beautiful, charismatic, dynamic and humorous personalities.

Knowledge - each teacher/scholar taught us in a variety of different ways you actually remember what you listened to and don't get bored of 3 days of lectures.

Keeping fit - walking to and from lectures, lunch, salah all day for 3 days - you certainly feel the effects on the body.

Family time. Back in your rooms there is no internet, cooking, laundry or distractions - just the family. You're 'forced' to spend quality time together :-)

Safety. You actually let your children run around here and there and know that they are safe with sisters looking out for each others children.

Alkauthar revision :-) The finance seminars for the first time didn't go over my head thanks to my teacher Sheikh Abu Yusuf and the Alkauthar Real Deal course. I found myself engrossed in what Tarek Al Diwany had to say about the monetary/banking systems, keen to hear more and captivated by the seminar on inheritance.
I cant wait till The Real Deal 201!

Ok here's the girly bit. I can't forget shopping can I? Being able to shop in a halal music free environment. A vast selection of fabrics, cuts, styles in Abaya's and Hijaab and the once a year opportunity to find the 'perfect' Niqaab for you that aren't always available locally.
Some sisters actually let their customers take items home without paying, promising that they will send a cheque when they get back home. Thats what I call real trust.

And Cons? - The Price? Yes its more expensive than previous years, but is without a doubt worth it. And today I recieved a cheque through the post from tax returns that I had forgotten about - when you spend in the way of Allah - Allah always gives back more. SubhanAllah.

Anyway Here's more on JIMAS....

In Cuba - simple pleasures.

In Cuba (Guantanamo Bay), the brothers would try to save the stalk of any apple or pear they were given. They would then hide it and wait for it to dry out so that they could then use it as Miswaak.

When the US soldiers found out they would search them - and their 'cages' for it - a fruit stalk of all things. But then it was a small luxury for the brothers. And they weren't supposed to have basic needs and necessities - never mind luxuries.

Parenting Course Notes – Week 2

By Umm Zaidah Nusaybah

Teaching children Aqeedah

At the beginning of this class we were asked by Umm Talha to give an example of something we have learnt recently and how that information was acquired. Some of the responses were as follows:

“I learnt how to cook rice without a rice cooker by trial and error”
“I discovered I needed to wear glasses whilst driving. My driving instructor advised me to go to the optician.”
“I learnt that babies can be given solids at 6 months. This information was related to me by my friend”

The thing I learnt that morning was the fact that I could get a different bus to my class. My husband drove me to the other bus stop, showed me where to get on, took the same route as the bus and finally showed me where to get off Alhamdulillah (I still haven’t taken that route because it seems too complicated!!).

You’re probably thinking, what was the point of this exercise? The reason why this exercise was conducted was to get us to think about the different methods involved in learning new information. After listening to the examples given by the sisters we came up with a list of the methods involved in learning new information. These are as follows:

Reading
Listening
Seeing/watching (visual)
Tasting
Experience
Smell
Thinking
Questioning
Touching and feeling
Exploring
Repeating

The most effective method by which children acquire new skills and information is by exploring, seeing, touching and feeling. Therefore, it is not wise to tell a small child to sit down for an hour or two while you explain to them the different categories of Tawheed from a big text book. Forget children this method of learning sometimes puts adults off!!

A better approach would be to take them out to the zoo or park and inform them that Allah has created the animals and He is the creator of everything. Therefore, he is known as Al-Khaaliq. You could point to a tree and say “did you know that even when a leaf falls from that tree, Allah knows about it.”
We should make teaching fun so that they are learning about Allah as well as having fun. We should constantly mention the name of Allah so that the child grows up loving Allah (SWT).

Also, when we are teaching them to say “Bismillah” before eating for example we should say it rhythmically or we could ask the child “what do you say before eating?” and the child can answer by saying “Bis-mill-llah”. However, one thing we should NEVER do is to force them to say something. Don’t be dictators because the most likely result of that would be rebellion. Instead of forcing them to say something, we should say it and they will copy us.

An example of this would be getting them to memorize, let’s say, the dua for traveling. So as soon as we get in the car we should say it out aloud and get the child to say it along with us. SubhanAllah, this method really works, my husband once told me how his colleague taught his children the times table by playing a cassette in the car on their journey to their school.

We should always use Standard English with our children because they will imitate what they hear. We should say “Alhamdulillah” and “Masha Allah” so that they will be familiar with these words. We should take the time out and communicate with them, play and bond with them. How often do we see the mother always disciplining, feeding, changing the child (basically doing all the boring chores), whilst the father plays with them and takes them out. We can be creative and make our own books with lots of bright pictures; this is fun and cost effective.

We should use references from the Qur’an and make children reflect on Allah’s creations. Every time we are out with our children we should try to relate everything back to Allah. We should use visual images from the Qur’an, for example when Allah (SWT) says:

"Have we not made for him to eyes, and a tongue and two lips?" Surah Balad: ayat 8-9

We can point to our eyes, tongue and lips while reciting the ayah and inform our children that Allah (swt) has given us these things so that they become thankful to Allah for His blessings.

I just want to finish off by mentioning a beautiful example given by a sister about an incident that occurred with her son. Her son was talking to her about what he wanted to be when he grows up, he mentioned a few things and then he said “I want to be Allah” (because he loved Allah so much he wanted to be like him). I think the normal response from mothers would be “Astaghfirullah, don’t say things like that”, wouldn’t it? Or “don’t be silly how can you be Allah?” However, Masha Allah this sister used her wisdom. She remembered the story of Ibraheem (AS) and Nimrud so she said to her son “okay, you want to be Allah? Can you create the sun and make it move from one place to the next? Can you give life to the dead? Her son realised he couldn’t do these things so he knew he couldn’t be Allah. SubhanAllah what a beautiful story and what an effective way to teach children About Allah’s attributes.

May Allah give us the ability to raise pious children with the correct Aqeedah. Ameen

Here's an excercise...

Lift up your arm (either one) in the air with your fingers pointing to the ceiling.

Now leave it there for about 2 minutes.

Is it starting to feel heavy?

Well according to a childminders training course a friend of mine is doing, this is how a child feels when they hold a grown ups hand going for a walk or even to the corner shop.

Lesson? Use a Safety Harness.

The Coffin: Another Way Out of Guantanamo

Moazzam Begg
Cageprisoners

31-05-07

News of yet another death in my former place of torment, Guantánamo Bay, comes with great sadness, but little surprise. When three young Muslim men detained in Guantanamo returned home in coffins last year - two Saudis and one Yemeni – the US commander, Rear Admiral Harry Harris and assistant secretary of state for public diplomacy Colleen Graffy, the described the alleged suicides as acts of ‘asymmetric warfare’ and ‘a good PR move’. These tactless words proved embarrassing even for the usually hard-line President himself. Henceforth, the stated aim of Mr. Bush was that he ‘would like to see Guantánamo closed’. It’s almost a year to date since these men died, yet results of the autopsy have still not been released. Since attention regarding these cases tapered off into insignificance for the Bush administration conditions in Guantanamo have deteriorated according to visiting detainee lawyers, human rights organisations and the handful of released prisoners.

I’ve spoken with some of my former cell mates released this year who tell me conditions have worsened and are unbearably bleak and harsh in all sections of the camp. Concentrations of large numbers of prisoners in tiny cells, with no natural light, solitary confinement, constant glaring lights, no communication with the outside world and very little recreation have brought many more people to breaking point than the US administration would have us believe.

Instead of informing families directly, the US administration has deemed it more appropriate to simply release a terse press statement which mentions only the dead man’s nationality and time of death. When I called the Guantanamo public affairs office they were unable to confirm the name or the number of the deceased man. There are over 60 Saudi families with loved ones held in Guantanamo and I’ve been on the phone with a few of them already. They are undoubtedly distraught with anxiety, each one bracing itself for the worst. One of them is the family of my friend, Shaker Aamer, a Saudi national and South London resident, whose British family – including a son he’s never seen – have waited for him in anguish for five and a half years. He has been on hungers-strike for over six months, kept alive having liquid food forced through his nasal passage into his stomach. Shaker has spent a total of over three years in solitary confinement. When I received a letter from him last year he was in a state of paranoia - feeling he could trust no one. One of the last letters received by his family states:

“I am dying here every day, mentally and physically. This is happening to all of us. We have been ignored, locked up in the middle of the ocean for years. Rather than humiliate myself, having to beg for water, I would rather hurry up the process [of dying] that is going to happen anyway.

“I would like to die quietly, by myself. I was once 250 lbs (17 stone 12 lbs). I dropped to 130 lbs (9 stone 4 lbs) in the first hunger strike. I want to make it easy on everyone. I want no feeding, no forced tubes, no ‘help’, no ‘intensive assisted feeding’. This is my legal right.

“The British government refuses to help me. What is the point of my wife being British? I thought Britain stood for justice, but they … abandoned us [British residents], people who have lived in Britain for years, and who have British wives and children. I hold the British government responsible for my death, as I do the Americans.”

The British government maintains that it cannot make representations on behalf of non-UK citizens held in Guantánamo, the way it did – after three years – for me. But only a few weeks ago Bisher al-Rawi, an Iraqi national and British resident, was returned to the UK and released after the UK government negotiated his repatriation due to ‘special interests’. We – including Bisher - are all agreed that the UK government’s stance is now untenable. They must call for Shaker’s return home – if it isn’t already too late. Some of the last words Shaker related to his (and my) lawyer in Guantanamo, Clive Stafford Smith, was the US military response to his protest against treatment and imprisonment without charge or trial:

“Do you think the world will ever learn of your hunger strike? We will never let them know…We care nothing if [any] one of you dies.”

I used to escape from Guantánamo every night in my sleep – praying that I’d never awake. Waking up the next day was part of a slow death which I was finally delivered from. Many Guantánamo prisoners I believe now make the same prayer, and if they are not released, more of them will be escaping: in coffins.


Moazzam Begg
Spokesman
Cageprisoners
PO Box 45798
London
SW16 4XS
Email: moazzam.begg@cageprisoners.com
Web: www.cageprisoners.com

Holidays... who needs the tele?

New scheme at libraries.

At my local library yesterday as my daughter and I had scanned out our books and were leaving, I noticed a rail with some brightly colored red bags hanging. 'Book Bags for under 5's'

"Are they free?" I asked the librarian. (Who doesn't love Freebies.).
She replied in the affirmative, so naturally I went over to have a look.
Yes they were free, for 3 weeks. Just like the rest of our books.

The book bags each have their own theme. I chose the one labeled, 'FOOD'.
Each sack provides a fiction and non-fiction book, a parent guide and a matching educational toy or game to go with the theme. Some will include an audio tape or CD and sometimes even scenery.

Here is what was in my bag,

A toy toaster with 2 slices of toast. (My daughter toasted them, tried to eat them and then threw them in the bin when she had finished thinking they were real.)


A fictional and a non- fictional book.
Both of them to go with the food theme.
Other themes available are Animals, Mummy, Daddy,Clothes, Colours, Farming and more.

What did I love the most about my story bag?
Inside there was an activity sheet labeled, 'Top Tips for using the bag...'
Tip number 1 was - Turn the television off.'
New Scheme at Libraries

And among other tips were the following...
Find a comfortable place to sit together and look at the book or play.
Look at the pictures, read the story or just talk about what you see. Feel free to change the story!
Take turns pointing picture out in the book.
Maybe your child likes to color, cut, or scribble on the activity sheet.

Try to take 5 to 10 minutes special time in the day to have fun together.

`

Al Adab AlMufrad Notes. By Saabirah.

Adab al Mufrad Notes (8)
Monday, 30 July 2007

Hadith/athar: Ibn Umar said: "if someone fears his Lord and maintains his ties of kinship, his term of life will be prolonged, he will have abundant wealth and his people will love him."

As above with a different isnad.

Example of Bukhari-tronics – chapter title ("Allah Loves the One Who Maintains His Ties Of Kinship") doesn’t correspond with hadiths, they don’t say anything about Allah loving the person. Some imams refer to hadith where Allah says He loves so and so, then telling Jibreel to that person who tells the inhabitants of the heavens and earth to love that person. Hence we know the only way people will love a person in this way is when Allah loves him.

First narration has tadlees, but second one does not thus strengthening first. Hadtih can be reported in different ways, some ways "stronger" than others. Haddathanee (he narrated to me), akhbarnee (he informed me), qaal (he said), sami’nee (I heard) imply strength just from their wording. ‘An (on the authority of) is lesser in strength as it denotes hearing either in person or through another reporter therefore further study is required. Tadlees of 3 types:
- Tadlees al isnad. The reporter says "on the authority of" someone who he didn’t actually relate the hadith to him or from someone he didn’t actually meet which creates the impression he actually heard it from him in person.
- Tadlees ash-shuyukh. The reporter doesn’t refer to the person he heard it from by name, uses a less well-known name.
- Tadlees at-taswiyyah. Reporter misses out the weaker link before him and refers directly to the stronger link preceding the weaker link to make the chain look strong. Worst kind of tadlees. Shu'bah said, "Tadlis is the brother of lying" and "To commit adultery is more favourable to me than to report by way of Tadlis."

Athar is mauquf – doesn’t reach Prophet (sal Allahu 'alaiyhi wa sallam). However we can act on it if it is marfoo’ hukman – as though Prophet (sal Allahu 'alaiyhi wa sallam) said it. Statement shows it is impossible sahabi could say it out of own reasoning i.e. matter of ghayb.

"Fears his Lord" – taqwa often translated as fear. Word from waqa – protection, wiqayah is a shield or preservative for food. Qur'an and sunnah gives validation to linguistic definition.
Ibn Rajab al Hanbali included definition as putting something between you and the whom you are fearful of to protect you. How? By obeying Him and leaving that which displeases Him.
Surah Ra’d (13:34) – "for them will be punishment in the life of (this) world, and the punishement of the Hereafter is more severe. And they will not have from Allah any protector." Root word of taqwa has meaning of one who gives protection.

Qur'an also tells us to have taqwa of punishment, taqwa of places of punishment (grave, Hell), the One who gives punishment, the Day when punishment will be meted out. Highest form of taqwa is taqwa of Allah. Taqwa is a right of Allah. Surah Muddaththir (74:56) "…He is worthy of fear and adequate for (granting) forgiveness," and "O you who believe, fear Allah, as He should be feared, and let not yourself die save as Muslims." Surah Al Imran 3:102

Some benefits of taqwa:
- Forgives all sins
- Increases rewards
- Jannah reserved for those having taqwa
- Allah’s pleasure
- Allah supports them, is with them
- Allah doesn’t waste their deeds
- Allah makes a way out for them in their difficulties
- Allah makes his affairs easy
- Allah gives them baseerah, hidden insight
- Allah gives them furqan – criterion to judge right and wrong
- Allah gives them najwa – saves them from destruction like those of previous nations

Prophet (sal Allahu 'alaiyhi wa sallam) prayed, "O Allah I asked you for guidance, nobility, self-sufficiency/wealth and tuqa (from waqa)." Qur'an is guidance for the muttaqeen (surah Baqarah 2:2). Self-sufficency prevents one from depending on others. Wealth never affects people of taqwa negatively. Those it affects negatively have weak taqwa.

Two things to protect one from Hellfire – taqwa and good conduct.

Taqwa involves finding out about those things to avoid. "Ignorance is bliss" is not the attitude of the muttaqi.

Hasan al Basri "Taqwa will remain with the muttaqi as long as he keeps away from the halal fearing it may be haram." Basic level is staying away from haram, next is avoiding the doubtful matters (shubuhaat) and highest level is keeping away from some of the halal too. Muttaqis’ characteristic is he has taqwa of things people think one shouldn’t have taqwa on. Muttaqi is like someone on a path with thorns on the side to be avoided. Sufi scholars of the later generations (khalaf) divided it thus:
(1) Islam (rejecting kufr)
(2)Tauba (falls into sin and repents when he sins)
(3) Wara' (caution) (avoiding shubuhaat)
(4) Zuhd (avoiding halal)
(5) Mushahadah ("witnessing" Allah)

Very few people have these qualities hence very few muttaqeen exist unfortunately. Umar ibn Abdul Aziz: "…For those who preach about it are many, and those who actually practice it few..."

For more details esp. qur'anic/hadith references: See Here



Adab al Mufrad Notes (7)
Saturday, 21 July 2007
(Classes 15/06/07 to 22/06/07)

Hadith/athar: Anas ibn Malik said: “The Messenger of Allah (sal Allahu 'alaiyhi wa sallam) said, ‘Whoever wishes to have his provision expanded and his term of life prolonged should maintain ties of kinship.’”

Hadith/athar: Abu Hurayra said: “The Messenger of Allah (sal Allahu 'alaiyhi wa sallam) said, ‘Whoever is pleased to have his provision expanded and his term of life lengthened should maintain ties of kinship.’”

Anas ibn Malik is THE narrator of hadith on adab. We see so much of the Prophet’s (sal Allahu 'alaiyhi wa sallam) character and qualities from his hadiths. Imam Dhahabi said of him: “He is the narrator of this religion.” He was 10 years old when he became Muslim. 20 years old when the Prophet (sal Allahu 'alaiyhi wa sallam) passed away. In between that time he spent his life with Prophet (sal Allahu 'alaiyhi wa sallam) in his service. Umm Sulaym, his mother, brought him up by herself after her husband died. she later married Abu Talha ibn Thabit. She was very poor and didn’t have nice clothes for him to meet the Prophet (sal Allahu 'alaiyhi wa sallam) in when he arrived in Madinah. She went in front of the Prophet (sal Allahu 'alaiyhi wa sallam) and offered him her son saying she cannot give him what others can give him by way of wealth etc but he can have “Unais” (affectionate variation of the name Anas) as his servant and make du’a for him. As a result of the Prophet‘s (sal Allahu 'alaiyhi wa sallam) du’a for Allah to increase his wealth, progeny and lifespan, Anas had 100 offspring (109 and 129 in other narrations), remained one of the last companions to pass away and harvest his crops twice a year instead of once.

Prophet (sal Allahu 'alaiyhi wa sallam) used the Umm Sulaym’s house to rest in. He didn’t used to rest in any other house apart from his wives’. He’d pray nafl prayers there and make du’a for barakah in the house. Prophet (sal Allahu 'alaiyhi wa sallam) treated her very respectfully. She was his confidante and advisor. Umm Sulaym a woman of character and honour, sacrificing her son to be Prophet‘s (sal Allahu 'alaiyhi wa sallam) servant.

Really get to see someone’s true self in their private life – publicly everyone is great, those at home know what a person is really like. We get a bulk of this knowledge about Prophet (sal Allahu 'alaiyhi wa sallam) from Anas’ hadiths, who lived with him.

Anas taught some of kibar of imams. When in ihram he wouldn’t speak to anyone, so absorbed in ibadah. When he used to get up to pray he’d pray so much his feet would bleed. Abu Hurayra said, “I never saw anyone’s worship closer to the Prophet‘s (sal Allahu 'alaiyhi wa sallam) than Anas’.”

Anas died aged 103. died of plague. His mother kept some of the sweat of Prophet (sal Allahu 'alaiyhi wa sallam) and mixed it with perfume. Anas requested to be perfumed with that when he died.

Anas placed before Abu Hurayrah, despite the fact Abu Hurayrah pf greaster authority in area of maintaining kinship ties. Why? Perhaps because Anas ibn Malik was one of final sahabah to pass away, as though he is living testimony to the hadith – i.e. his life was prolonged.

Rizq commonly understood to mean money. But can mean anything good including that which isn’t visible including health, spirituality. Risq of intellect – truth which is "fed" to you i.e. Islamic ‘ilm.

Noonsa – prolong or delay something. In terms of life:
- physical increase of life – e.g. written in preserved tablet you will die at 60, you’re good to your parents, Allah gives you life until 70;
- Barakah in ones’ time e.g. you can do in one hour what others need a day to do. Imam Bukhari was good to his parents, he could do alone what would take a team of people;
- Ones’ old age will be worth living. One won’t have the illnesses of old age e.g. dementia. Prophet (sal Allahu 'alaiyhi wa sallam) used to seek refuge in Allah from becoming senile. His increase will make him realise the benefits of maintaining ties of kinship i.e. his children will be good to him.

Word atharihi used – remnants or traces, proof of something having occurred (footprints in the desert proof camel has walked there). Some say this is something that will persist after death – his children will maintain ties of kinship and make du’a for him. Ones’ children maintaining ties of kinship after death will result in people making du’a for him (e.g. rahimahuLlah) after recognising good deeds of his children.

If we’re going with interpretation of just ones’ lifespan being prolonged (Imam Tirmidhis’) why would we want a long life which is like a prison for us? Prophet (sal Allahu 'alaiyhi wa sallam) said the best of people is he who lives a long life and does good deeds and the worst one is the one who lives a long life and does bad deeds. Life means opportunity for good deeds. Those in Hell will realise value of life hence they will ask to be returned so they can do deeds to prevent being in Hell. Exception – dying as martyr, ones’ sins are forgiven therfore permissible to pray for and desire shahadah. Also during fitnah of final days especially of Dajjal, one will pass by a grave and wish he was in the dead person’s place.



Friday, 22 June 2007
Adab al Mufrad Notes (6)
(Classes: 08/06/07 to 15/06/07

Hadith/athar: Abdullah ibn Amr said, "The Prophet (sal Allahu 'alaiyhi wa sallam) pointed his finger towards us and said, ‘The (root word of) rahim (the kin) is derived from the word Rahman (the Merciful). Whoever maintains the connection of ties of kinship, Allah will maintain ties with him. Whoever cuts them off, Allah will cut him off. The kin will have a free and eloquent tongue on the Day of Rising.’"

Hadith/athar: Aisha, may Allah be pleased with her, said: "The Prophet (sal Allahu 'alaiyhi wa sallam) said, ‘The word rahim is derived from Allah (Rahman). Whoever maintains the ties of kinship, Allah will maintain ties with him. Whoever cuts them off, Allah cuts him off.’"

Ties of kinship depicted as a physical being.

Abdullah ibn Amr – Abu Hurayrah said of him, "He has more (hadith) than I do."

Aisha – born into the house of the greatest man after the Prophet (sal Allahu 'alaiyhi wa sallam), then with the Prophet (sal Allahu 'alaiyhi wa sallam) himself, then spent the next fifty years of her life in the company of the greatest men of the ummah. From a very young age she was surrounded by knowledge. Some of the most personal matters of the deen narrated through her. Many hadith reveal her sense of humour and her natural jealousy of Khadija, the first wife of the Prophet (sal Allahi 'alaiyhi wa sallam), showing jealousy is natural and not blameworthy within the bounds. Every single characteristic of a Muslim women can be found in her yet she understood the difference between men and women. Prophet (sal Allahu 'alaiyhi wa sallam) didn't hide his love for her as is narrated in the hadiths. She used to compare herself with other wives and boast about her marriage to him. Only virgin wife, others were married for different reasons. Chosen by Allah – he (sal Allahu ‘alaiyhi wa sallam) saw her in a dream. Great role model for both men and women. Her status made clear when he sought permission from all of his (sal Allahu 'alaiyhi wa sallam) wives to spend his last days with her. He died in her lap, she was the last person to see him before he passed way. Defending her honour become a matter of aqeedah for ahl us sunnah due to the extreme shi'as who defile it, despite the Qur'anic ayahs.

Bukhari includes 2 similar hadiths together for certain reasons. Can either just take basic benefits e.g. obligatory to maintain kinship ties, Allah punishes the one who cuts them off etc or look deeper for the secrets. One such secret benefit could be looking at why Prophet (sal Allahu 'alaiyhi wa sallam) pointed. Physical actions sometimes directly attached to hadith e.g. in following hadith Abu Bakra said that the Messenger of Allah (sal Allahu ‘alaiyhi wa sallam) said: "Shall I tell you which is the worst of the major sins?" He repeated that 3 times. They replied, "Yes, Messenger of Allah." He said, "Associating something else with Allah and disobeying parents." He had been reclining, but then he sat up and said, "Beware of lying." Abu Bakra added, "He continued to repeat it until I wished he would stop." Prophet (sal Allahu 'alaiyhi wa sallam) sitting up brings our attention to what he is saying, which on the face of it appears less significant than the other issues. However some physical actions not related to hadith. This hadith one such example. One benefit we can take from it is it shows how scrupulous sahabah were in noticing details – refutation of the critics of hadith.

"Derived from" – Arabic word is "shajna" – resembling roots of trees, interlocked, connected. Everything from Allah anyway – creation, our actions, including ties of kinship. But this link sets it apart from all, derived from His name and mentioned specifically.

What is the wisdom behind saying "whoever cuts them off…" when "whoever maintains them" implicitly tells us about the case of those who don’t do so? Hadith directly addresses both those who maintain-and those who cut off, not letting the latter group off the hook.

Word sila (maintains) also means gift which will render the meaning to be "whoever maintains the ties of kinship, Allah will reward him".

On the day of judgement we cannot imagine some of the things that will happen. Surah Yaseen says our limbs will testify what our actions were. Concept of those that do not speak having the ability to speak not unique to this hadith. "Non-tangible" beings will do things they logically shouldn’t be able to do e.g. Qur'an interceding for Muslims, stones bearing witness for/against us, death appearing as a ram and being killed etc. Not important how and other details but to have yaqeen that it will happen and move onto things we can know, unlike way of deviance who base whole belief system on doubtful matters.

"The kin will have a talq and dhalq tongue". Talq from talaq, to be loosened, letting go e.g. divorce, without restrictions, unhindered, without barriers, no-one to stop him. Dhalq – sharpened, tip of spear, penetrating, eloquent speech. Both together gives us meaning of speech without restriction, when spoken it is destructive. A powerful and scary combination.



Thursday, 14 June 2007
Adab al Mufrad Notes (5)
(Classes: 01/06/07 to 08/06/07)

Hadith/athar: Abdur-Rahman ibn Awf said: "The Messenger of Allah (sal Allahu ‘alaihi wa sallam) said: ‘Allah, the Mighty and Exalted said, "I am the Merciful (Rahman). I have created ties of kinship (rahim) and derived a name for it from my name, whoever maintains ties of kinship, I maintain ties with him and I shall cut off from Me whoever cuts them off."’"

Imam Ibn Shihab az-Zuhri in chain. Imam Dhahabi said that he is the hafiz of his time. Didn’t just mean hafiz of Qur'an, meant the whole Qur'an and the rulings in them and at least 100,000 ahadith. Studied under 7 fuqaha of Madina: ‘Urwah b. al-Zubayr, Sa‘īd b. al-Musayyib, Abu Bakr b. ‘Abd’l-Rahmān, Al-Qāsim b. Muhammad b. Abi Bakr, ‘Ubaydullāh b. ‘Abdullāh b. ‘Utbah b. Mas’ūd, Sulaymān b. Yasār and Khārijah b. Zayd b. Thābit and also taught great imams including Sufyan Ath-Thawri, Awza’i, Umar ibn Abdul Aziz – who said about him "no-one soaked up hadith like Ibn Shihab."

A person is known by his peers. Imam az-Zuhri’s peers had glowing praises of him who were big names in themselves.

Said to be the first man to write hadith with the purpose of teaching it.

Abdur-Rahman ibn Awf one of the 10 promised Paradise, understandable why after a brief look at his biography. One of the 6 in the shura to appoint next khalifa. Became Muslim at young age, even before dar al arqam, safe house of Muslims before open da’wah. Fought at Badr – the crucial battle for establishment of Islam. Allah says about ahl ul Badr, "do as you wish for I have forgiven you." One of those who gave their pledge under the tree as mentioned in Surah Fath about whom Allah says He is pleased with them. He was paired with Sa’d ibn Abi Waqqas who offered half of everything he had including his two wives, thus taking the Prophet‘s (sal Allahu 'alaiyhi wa sallam) request to the Ansar to host, help and share to the maximum. Abdur-Rahman ibn Awf refused and prayed for barakah in Sa’d’s wealth and family and asked for direction to the market where he could do trade.

Lesson: be self-sufficient and rely not on others but Allah, even if what people can give you is your haqq. The more you rely on people the less you rely on Allah and the less people’s opinion of you becomes. Abdur-Rahman ibn Awf became known as Al-Ghani, the rich, as he made today's equivalent of millions. Because of his wealth and in comparison the way some of the other sahabah were killed or died in poverty, he used to say he fears his reward has been given in the dunya rather than the Hereafter.

Hadith Qudsi. Allah’s speech of 3 types: (i) perfect – unchanged, protected i.e. Qur'an; (ii) Books of prophets – divine revelation before people corrupted them; (iii) Hadith qudsi – inspired via wahy, conveyed by Prophet (sal Allahu 'alaiyhi wa sallam) in his own words. Qudsi not always authentic. Should pay attention to what topics Allah selects for qudsi – in this case ties of kinship, has significance.

Allah could have used name Raheem, which may have been closer to rahim. Names of Allah like Raheem, Quddus etc can be used to name people (without al) but Rahman cannot, as though there’s sanctity with this name. Knowing and understanding Names of Allah gives guidance in our ‘ibadah and conduct.

Something attached to Allah indicates its significance e.g. slave of Allah, Ruh Allah, camel of Allah. Allah links Himself with ties of kinship, to its origin and consequence of those who have correct conduct towards it- good and bad.



Friday, 8 June 2007
Adab al Mufrad Notes (4)
(Classes: 25/05/07 to 01/06/07)

Hadtih/athar: "Abu Hurayra said: "A man came to the Prophet (sal Allahu 'alaiyhi wa sallam) and said, ‘Messenger of Allah, I have relatives with whom I maintain connections while they cut me off. I am good to them while they are bad to me, they behave towards me like fools while I am forbearing towards them.’ The Prophet (sal Allahu 'alaiyhi wa sallam) said, ‘If things are as you say have said, it is as if you were putting hot ashes on them* and you will not lack a supporter against them from Allah as long as you continue to do that.’"

*i.e. it will cause them harm if they continue with their behaviour but will not harm you as it will result in their humiliation and you will gain respect in this world and the Hereafter.

Reported by Muslim also. Saheeh isnad and matn.

Ibn Abi Hatim in the chain. Faqih from the tabi’ tabi’in. Known to be as knowledgeable as Imam Malik who himself said "if there is a people and among them is Ibn Abi Hatim, they will be protected." Imam Malik not known for over-praising and exaggerating; known for being austere and serious. He was probably referring to Imam Ibn Abi Hatim’s taqwa, being a wali of Allah, rather than knowledge and qada.

Man knows what he’s doing is obligatory. He’s not approaching the Prophet (sal Allahu 'alaiyhi wa sallam) to be excused from it, he wants to know what he (sal Allahu 'alaiyhi wa sallam) has to say about the matter. The behaviour of his relatives akin to their own punishment. His good treatment and their bad treatment in return is like humiliation for them. Essence of maintaining kinship is difficulty, not what is easy and nice.

Repayment of good with mere neutrality is shameful. But replacement of good with bad is evil.

"If it is as you said" – allows for another side to the story, possibility of reality not being the mentioned scenario. In fatwa-seeking always a hidden side mufti doesn’t know hence he should be careful and prudent when giving verdicts. REAL men of knowledge past and present shied away from giving fatwa whereas many of us rush to give our opinion in deen matters. Should be cautious rather than hasty.

Lesson for general mass: speak and convey news and information in balanced, just and accurate manner.

"Putting hot ashes" – causing someone to get punished. Should he and others like him then not continue god treatment? No as they themselves are the cause for their own punishment. Statement following it encourages the man to continue if his good behaviour.



Friday, 1 June 2007
Adab al Mufrad Notes (3)
(Classes: 18/05/07 and 25/05/07)
More adab al mufrad notes. Sorry to give them all at once but I procrastinated.

Hadith/athar: Ibn Abbas said (about the verses): "Give the relative his due, and the needy and the traveller and squander not (thy wealth) in wantonness. Lo! The squanderers were ever the brothers of devils, and the devil was ever ingrate to his Lord. But if thou turn away from them, seeking mercy from thy Lord, for which thou hopest, then speak unto them a reasonable word. And let not thy hand be chained to thy neck nor open it with a complete opening, lest thou sit down rebuked, denuded." (17:26-29) "He begins by commanding the most pressing of the obligatory dues and He directs man to the best action if he has something – by His saying – ‘Give the relative his due and the needy and the traveller.’ Likewise He teaches man how he should excuse himself if he has nothing – by His saying – ‘If you turn away from them seeking the mercy from your Lord that you are hoping for, then speak gentle words to them.’ In the form of a good promise. ‘Do not keep your hand chained to your neck’ (like a miser that you do not give anything at all) ‘nor outspread it altogether so you sit reproached…’ (that means if you give everything, those who come to you later will find you empty and reproach you) ‘denuded’. (Ibn Abbas) said, that means: The person to whom you gave everything has denuded you.

Weak chain, has unknown person in it. But less strict in accepting/rejecting because it is athar not hadith. Scholars didn’t say whole thing is weak i.e. statement itself is sound.

Ayah tells us what one should do with money – (i) give it to relative, needy and traveller. (ii) If there’s no money to give, make promise that if you have money you’ll give it to them (iii) don’t be miserly or extravagant.

Ayah uses word "qurba" – close relatives.

The word "haqqahu" (due/right) implies reference to zakah whereas the word "aati" (give) is only used referring to sadaqah. Stipulated zakah recipients don’t include relatives. If ayat taken to refer to zakah it emphasises right of relative over other fuqara/masakeen (extremely poor/poor) and travellers if relative comes under these categories too. If taken to mean sadaqah also demonstrated right of relatives over others. Either way, relative comes before other needy people.

Wrong attitude to believe giving money to relative is a favour to them; doing so is merely giving them their right.

"Seeking mercy" – hoping for what Allah provides you with. What you have and can spend is attached to Allah who gives and takes as He wills to all of creation.

"Mercy from your Lord" – not our right. May not even deserve it.

"Hope for" – not guaranteed, shouldn’t expect it.

"Say gentle words" – not whinge, be rude, insult etc. Not sufficient to say "sorry don’t have any". Rather make a promise that if you have money insha’Allah you will give it. Qur'an teaches the highest moral in this aspect.

"Tied to neck" – analogy of a prisoner who is chained. Cannot move hands e.g. reach into pockets. Incapacitated. Ayah almost telling us not to act as though we have our hands tied when we don’t.

Also telling us not to place ourselves in trouble and difficulty yet Qur'an always starts with miserliness. Reflects most prominent problem – extravagance in giving in charity not as common.

"Rebuked" – blameworthy, no-one’s fault but your own, irresponsible with own wealth.

"Denuded" – Arabic word includes meanings of trapped, tired out, destitute. The one whom you wanted to help has left you in that state.

Subtle lessons to be learnt from Imam Bukhari’s choice of narrators. Ibn Abbas – could have chosen other narrators but he chose the cream of the crop as far as mufassireen are concerned. Ijma’ of scholars that tafsir of Qur'an by sahabah comes first. Example for us to choose only the best for our deen, no matter how difficult or how convenient other options are. Often choose best for dunya matters e.g. best doctor, school etc but deen more deserving.



Monday, 28 May 2007
Adab al Mufrad Notes (2)
(Classes: 04/05/07 and 11/05/07)

Hadith/athar: Abu Hurayra said: “When the following verse was revealed: ‘Warn your nearest relatives,’ (26:214), the Prophet (sal Allahu 'alaiyhi wa sallam) rose and called out, ‘Banu Ka’b ibn Lu’ayy! Save yourselves from the Fire! Banu Abd Manaf! Save yourselves from the Fire! Banu Abdul Muttalib! Save yourselves from the Fire! Fatima daughter of Muhammad! Save yourself from the Fire! I cannot alter Allah’s decision about you (if you deserve it). Except for the fact that you have ties of kinship which I shall maintain’”

“Bani” – people Refers to his forefathers and tribes. Wisdom - da’wah more acceptable from man of status & noble lineage. His own lineage reminds people of his background. Calling one’s own people also shows sincerity in the call: wanting to save own family. Success – Prophet‘s (sal Allahu 'alaiyhi wa sallam) closest sahabah linked in his lineage.

Call suggests: “if you continue in your kufr I cannot do anything to save you.”

“I cannot alter Allah’s decision about you”- humility. Despite his status with Allah he affirms he is powerless.

“I shall maintain” not accurate. Literally “add moisture, wet” – moisture basis of life, implies nurturing, sustaining, keeping alive. Connection to rahim (womb) and its connection to a foetus.

Fatima (may Allah be pleased with her) only 29 years old when she died. Went through much difficulties since young age. Mother died at young age, sisters died in her lifetime, lived in poverty and hardshio during married life, aged 5-10 years old when Quraishi persecuted Prophet (sal Allahu 'alaiyhi wa sallam).

“Zahra” – title meaning radiant. Prophet (sal Allahu 'alaiyhi wa sallam) sometimes called azhar (masculine) and she was most like him.


Hadith/athar: Abu Ayyub al Ansari said: “A Bedouin came to the Prophet (sal Allahu 'alaiyhi wa sallam) while he was travelling. He asked, ‘tell me what will bring me near to the Garden and keep me away from the Fire.’ He replied, ‘Worship Allah and do not associate anything with Him and perform the prayer and pay the zakah and maintain ties of kinship.’”

Prophet (sal Allahu 'alaiyhi wa sallam) arrived in Madinah with no family, wealth, living accommodation. We often notice the sacrifice and hardship of muhajireen who left everything behind but Ansar also went out of their way & completely changed their lives to accommodate the muhajireen. Abu/Umm Ayyub put themselves under stress just to accommodate the Prophet (sal Allahu 'alaiyhi wa sallam).

Abu Ayyub died during conquest of Constantinople under Yazeed’s rule aged 80. A great mujahid, he insisted he march there with the army so he could hear the footsteps of the armies and horses. Buried near there.

Most simple of person (Bedouin) asking most simple of questions and given most concise and simple answer.

Prophet (sal Allahu 'alaiyhi wa sallam) talks about great fundamental pillars of the religion then about maintaining ties of kinship – seems out of place. Hadith shows maintaining ties of kinship among these is not out of place, it deserves to be mentioned with them.

“Worship Allah” – ‘ibadah includes meaning of humbling oneself, putting oneself down, submit. When one enslaves oneself to other than Allah inevitably they become further from ‘ibadah to Allah and when they do that inevitably they become lower in the eyes of others. ‘Izzah of someone not in need of the dunya, not chasing after its pleasures is higher than one who has become a slave to the dunya. Only in Islam does one become greater in nobility and higher in status when they lower themselves for Allah.

These days da’wah often focuses on social issues but Prophet (sal Allahu 'alaiyhi wa sallam) always began with tawheed and we won't lose out if we do the same.

Qur'an and sunnah often mentions salah and zakah together. Former ‘ibadah of the body and latter of wealth.

Hadith first mentions rights of Allah and then rights of the people. Because they are mentioned together it implies we should devote similar amount of time spent studying tawheed, salah, zakah to studying ties of kinship.

“Bring me near” – not “guarantee me”, implies understanding of the man that effort on his part will be required as well as hoping in Allah.



Sunday, 27 May 2007
Adab al Mufrad Notes (1)
(Class: 27/04/07)
My friend took these notes for me at the adab class as I was doing the Price of Salvation Course.

Continuing with hadith/athar: Kulayb ibn Manfa’a said: “My grandfather said, ‘Messenger of Allah, towards whom should I be dutiful?’ He said, ‘Towards your mother, your father, your sister and your brother. Then towards your relative, the nearest to them. This is an obligatory duty and those ties of kinship must be maintained.’”

Our rights are first and foremost to our parents, due to their high status and importance.

After that, we have a duty to be in contact with, and in the service of, all of our extended family, whether they are practising or not, whether they are Muslim or not.

Maintaining ties of kinship is important as we are promoting key characteristics of the believers, such as love and mercy and confidence in one another. It also eradicates hatred and anger. All this ensures that a standard family unit functions in the best way possible.

We should think of the people we are in contact with in our families and ask ourselves why they are part of our lives. It should only ever be for the sake of Allah, and not for our own benefit.

The Ulema have stated that there are three potential scenarios which may lead to attaining paradise through our ties of kinship. Firstly, by maintaining ties even when the person you are maintaining ties with breaks away. This is the highest level. Secondly, by “getting even”. E.g., if someone calls you, you call them next time. If they buy you a present you buy one for them etc. Finally, where the other person does more than you do to maintain the tie of kinship. You will not enter paradise through this method.

This is an important lesson we can learn. Allah states that He is not swifter in punishment to anyone than those who break ties of kinship. For this purpose, we should endeavour to learn our lineage and family history so we aware of even the most distant of our relatives.

The title name “the obligation of maintaining ties of kinship” is revealing, as it shows that Imam Bukhari wished to make it clear from the start that maintaining ties IS an obligation. The details can be filled in later.

The hadith states we are obligated to be dutiful to our mothers, fathers, brothers, sisters and then our relatives and those nearest to us.

Although this hadith is weak, it can be used for this purpose as it is not very weak and as long as we say it may not be directly from the prophet, peace be upon him.

The rights of our brothers and sisters, in particular are often neglected.

There are two types of brothers and sisters. The first is our brothers and sisters in deen, and we have a general sense of loving and wanting to fulfil our rights to other muslims.
But our highest priority should always be our direct family. In particular, when advising or teaching others, we should always start with out nearest relatives.

The prophet, peace and blessing be upon him, maintained ties of kinship even with the non-Muslim family members who tried to harm him. So, imagine the rights and obligations our Muslim family members have.



Wednesday, 25 April 2007
Adab al Mufrad Series 1 recap

I do so love the adab al mufrad classes. That Friday feeling that Abu Eesa was talking about made everyone smile and nod knowingly; it's true, there's a real feeling of peace, tranquility and iman at that specific time in that specific place.

Anyway my excuse for posting the notes so late: laziness, stuff happening at home, procrastination, going to Birmingham for Mark of a Jurist and laziness. I've decided not to post all of the notes I made last year here yet and just to post what I'm making as we're going along insha'Allah. I hope you guys benefit and I hope any mistakes I make don't weigh heavily on my scale of bad deeds and that Allah helps us all to implement the 'ilm He entrusts us with.

RECAP OF SERIES ONE
DATE: 13/04/07

Weak hadiths can be used in adab if they meet the following conditions:

1. Can’t be very weak e.g. munkar narrator – known liar.
2. Has to come under something already mentioned (generally) elsewhere e.g. being good to parents.
3. Mention it is weak when relating it because otherwise attributing to the Prophet (sal Allahu 'alaiyhi wa sallam) something he may not have said i.e. lying upon him.

Birr – not translatable in one word. Includes good; dutiful; easy – no anger, resentment, bitterness, uptightness, laidback; righteousness, merciful, obedient.
Adab to others connected to adab to parents. Good adab to others voluntary, to parents obligatory.

Birr to parents only in permissible things.

Birr to mother more emphasised – she’s more emotional, prone to get angry quicker, take bad feelings to extremes e.g. cursing, therefore imperative to please her and ensure her calmness. Displeasing father has more immediate implications – he can beat you, become socially disgraced if he disowns you, withdraws you from inheritance. With mother, easier to get false sense of security if she is displeased.

Mother has greater right of good treatment – to spend time with her, be easy on her etc. Father has greater right to obedience and your finances.

Birr not contingent on their being good to you, birr is their right whether you like it or not. Likened to taxes. :-)

Soft speech, nothing said to harm them.

Don’t think about repaying them, never possible. An obligation, have to do it hence just get on with it.

Dependence on parents from cradle to grave – physically in womb and early years, later on for advice, finance etc up to death. Even after their death we hope for inheritance. At no stage are they dependent on us so no point thinking we can repay them.

Different hadiths give emphasis in different ways how serious ‘uqooq (opposite of birr) to parents is.

Barakah of ones’ life increases with birr, not just number of years, including adding to ones’ good deeds, blotting out bad deeds, increasing ones’ honour and respect.

If ones’ parents are still alive don’t miss out on the chance to enter Paradise.

If you want anyone to make du’a for you, make it your parents.


DATE: 20/04/07
CONTINUE OF RECAP

Even fard can be put aside over service to parents e.g. jihad and hijrah (as long as they are fard kifayah).

Birr includes not just being good to them but also being wary of their emotions which influences their du’aas. Just from result of their du’aas one can end up in the fire. Knowledge of this science should be invested in and passed on just because of this – can decide whether we go to Paradise or Hell.

Treatment of parents unaffected by status or even existence of their deen (i.e. non-Muslim) or their being good to you: birr not mukafaha (from kifayah) i.e. "you be good to me, I’ll be good to you, you suffice me, I’ll suffice you."

Certain aspects of adab don’t always make logical sense e.g. not sitting before your father (one can argue my father doesn’t mind my sitting before him, I don’t see what birr has got to do with sitting before or after someone etc etc) hence needs to be studies not assumed – naql before aql.

Some athar have sahaba saying something is fard/haram – these are treated as hadith as they wouldn’t say so without it originating from the Prophet (sal Allahu 'alaiyhi wa sallam).

Not calling parents by first name – here cause needs to be looked at. Prohibition because it is offensive but if offence is caused if parent prefers first name then although unusual, it is to be respected.


Hadith/athar: Kulayb ibn Manfa’a said: "My grandfather said, ‘Messenger of Allah, towards whom should I be dutiful?’ He said, ‘Towards your mother, your father, your sister and your brother. Then towards your relative, the nearest to them. This is an obligatory duty and those ties of kinship must be maintained.’"

"Kinship" not accurate translation of rahim. Relation from blood, marriage or adoption.

Adab covers our interaction with everything/everyone around us – animals, environment, people. From these, adab to kin comes first, from that adab to parents comes first.

Good adab to parents is a cure for ills of society.

The way Imam Bukhari arranges and names his chapters of hadith is a field of fiqh in itself!

Rahim also means womb – place of mercy at its’ extreme where foetus completely helpless and dependent. Womb completely sustains and maintains its life.

Rahma defined as "to not punish the one who deserves punishment and to do good to the one who doesn’t deserve it".

Understanding rahma helps to understand greatness of relations of the womb and other kin.

Difference of opinion on what rahim includes:

- Family and anyone we’re related to – general.
- Those who have a defined share of inheritance – science of inheritance.
- Maternal relations only.

Sila from wasila – join, maintain.

Hadith weak. Narrator is Bakr ibn Harith. Baghdadi and Tirmidhi considered him sahabi but others didn’t which means there could be a break in chain.

Relatives not necessarily in order so not the case that one is better than the other – the word "then" not used.

Imam Bukhari includes it as it’s the only hadith on the topic that has the word obligatory in it although we know it is an obligation from other texts. Just adding extra info hence can be used.

Inspiration at its best.

An Insight Into Yemen.

The Mothers of Yemen.

Photographer Abbie Trayler-Smith talks to Riazat Butt about Oxfam's midwife training program in Yemen.

Maybe I should study midwifery....

Home Study

I'd really like to study further - from home. But I don't know what. Mainly something to keep myself occupied in something beneficial and to expand my general knowledge. I don't mind if the subject is Islamic or something else.

Ideally I would like something that is spread over the year or even termly, not longer.
Any Advice, Ideas, links etc would be greatly appreciated.